That was an enjoyable read. I loved the way you described the narrators experience of getting their morning food delivered, and the psychosexual nature of the (presumably ineffective) mental health clinic. I especially like how your description of the practioners was humanising and kind of gross at the same time.
I like the voice and the causal, drifting way you build your world and characters. I'm intrigue to learn more about Iona and what makes her tick. Well done.
I'm normally very critical, but this is rather good. There were a couple of places where I was unclear, but I've only read it once, so that might be me. The sudden transition to a workplace threw me, as did the ducks and the pond. Still, this has a lot going for it. Very in the moment which is always great. Thank you.
Intrigued! Here because Chuck Palahniuk linked to this in his email. Glad I checked it out!
Thanks!
I'm hooked. That is all.
Oh, good! Can't wait to improve it even more.
this was such a fun read!
Thank you! I'm glad.
Holy heck in a hand basket! That’s damn near perfect!!!! Now that’s a friggin’ STORY! I’m in— I want more.
Thanks Kerri! I'm glad it drew you in.
That was an enjoyable read. I loved the way you described the narrators experience of getting their morning food delivered, and the psychosexual nature of the (presumably ineffective) mental health clinic. I especially like how your description of the practioners was humanising and kind of gross at the same time.
It's a thin line isn't it. Thanks!
Absolutely enjoyable. Thank you!
Thank YOU :)
You packed so much story into unsaid details, it makes me hungry!
I'm so glad I took the time to read. Looking forward to reading more from you~
Thanks Misty, I appreciate your support.
I like the voice and the causal, drifting way you build your world and characters. I'm intrigue to learn more about Iona and what makes her tick. Well done.
That's the goal, thanks Rob!
I was engrossed! I like her ambivalence and the direct way she tells the story, with so little emotion attached to what she's doing.
Thank you, definitely what I'm aiming for. :)
I'm normally very critical, but this is rather good. There were a couple of places where I was unclear, but I've only read it once, so that might be me. The sudden transition to a workplace threw me, as did the ducks and the pond. Still, this has a lot going for it. Very in the moment which is always great. Thank you.
Thanks Michael!
I’m in. And Chuck Palahniuk posted a link to this chapter - I think you’re about to get a lot of new fans! 😄
Oh that would be neat, appreciate the support!
Interesting start!
Thanks :)
Good shit! Send a picture?
hey now!
If we could all live without cell-phones again, even for a month, how would we feel?